As I’ve shared, I suffer from depression. I found out my senior year of high school that I have depression and it’s the reason why I was exhausted all the time and didn’t connect very well with people and why I cut myself for 3 years and why I had an eating disorder. But, I’d rather not focus on the bad. I feel my past does not define my future but helped me realize what I wanted from life.
I’m 25 and a stay at home mom. I have 3 crazy, wild, beautiful children. My children are 5, 2 (almost 3), and 8 and a half months old. They are my true passion and joy. Being a mother has helped me with my depression and also made it worse. I have suffered from post patten depression with each of my children. It got worse with each one. My depression mainly makes me feel like I’m not good enough for them or anyone. I have a wonderful bond with each of my children, but feel insufficient. Now you may be thinking “oh great another post about parenthood and depression”. My story is much different. Yes I suffer from depression, but that’s the reason I’m taking this journey.
I read a book called The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin and found myself truly inspired. I was laying in bed one morning thinking about how unhappy I am and realized I should try a Happiness journey. It is proven to help depression, so it’s right up my alley. My main focus is to find myself through this year long journey.
I make resolutions each year and like many find it hard to keep them. After reading the book I decided to try one last time. My resolution this year is to spend a year trying new things and challenging myself. I have been a mother since I found out I was pregnant at 19 years old. I have spent my 20’s always taking care if other people. But, have spent my entire life always doing, saying, acting according to someone else’s plan. So, 2019 is my opportunity to finally discover who I am and perhaps find a new hobby.
Any ideas of new things I can try are always welcome. I recently joined an adult book club at my local library. I figured that would be a good starting point on my journey and it would get me out of the house and around other adults. The first meeting is on January 19, so stay tuned to hear how it goes.
I would love for my blog to be interactive. I would love feedback and comments and suggestions to continue my journey. Like I mentioned above, I’m hoping to make this a year long journey and hope to possibly inspire others to try a Happiness and self discovery journey of their own. Everyone’s journey will be completely different but just as exciting.
So my question to everyone is, what resolutions do you make for the new year and what are your favorite hobbies?